“FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES AS WE FORGIVE THOSE

WHO TRESPASS AGAINST US” (MT 6:12; LK 11:4)

PATHS TO FORGIVENESS ¹

Introduction

“The more I read the gospel the more I think it is all about forgiveness.” (Bishop Bob Barren at a conference of the Archdiocese of Chicago.)  Forgiveness is one of the hardest things for us to do as humans. However it is essential that we do so as it is a fundamental Christian duty that is necessary for our salvation.  It is also the only way to peace on earth.

Prayer

Pray for the grace to forgive from the heart as Christ desires.  This is transcendent for humans, beyond the ability of our hearts and spirits.  But “nothing is impossible with God” Lk 1:37;  Mk 14:36!  Meditating on the biblical teaching on forgiveness opens the soul to this grace.

The Teachings and Personal Example of Jesus Christ, Fully Divine and Fully Human

“… forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us …” Mt 6:12; Lk 11:4

“If you forgive others their transgressions, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your transgressions.” Mt 6:14-15

“Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him, seven times?  Jesus answered, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times.” Mt 18: 21-22; Lk 17:4

“… pray for those who mistreat you.” Lk 6:28

“… love your enemies and do good to them …; then your reward will be great and you will be children of the Most High, for He Himself is kind to the ungrateful and the wicked.  Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.” Mt 5:44; Lk 6:35-36

“Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.” Lk 23:34

Other Biblical Teachings on Forgiveness

Two of the many moving stories of forgiveness in the Bible:

• David spares Saul 1 Sm 24:1-16
• The Prodigal Father Lk 15:11-32

See The New American Bible Revised Edition Concise Concordance John R. Kohlenberger III, Editor Oxford University Press, 2012 ISBN: 978-0-19-981253-0.  The entries for Forgive and related terms contain dozens of verses from the Old and New Testaments that reveal God’s will regarding forgiveness

Non-Biblical Spiritual Literature and Online Resources

Just a few of the many resources on mercy and forgiveness:

Facing Forgiveness: A Catholic’s Guide to Letting Go of Anger and Welcoming

Forgiveness, Loughlan Sofield et al., Ave Maria Press, 2007

The Art of Forgiving: When You Need to Forgive and Don’t Know How by Lewis B. Smedes

Forgive and Forget by Lewis B. Smedes

Internet  www.YouTube.com  >  Search: Rwanda Murderer Asks for Forgiveness; Amish Grace & Forgiveness;

Reflect on Forgiveness in Your Life

 Feeling forgiven

Prayerfully think about a time you have felt forgiven in your life, whether forgiven by God or someone you have offended.  Let that feeling of forgiveness sink into your heart and let it move you to forgive others in the same way.

Allowing God’s blessings to lead you to forgiveness

Perhaps the offense you suffered resulted in graces in your life you would not have received otherwise; an example of this is the moving story of Joseph’s forgiveness of his brothers in Gn 50:15-21.  Like Joseph, let the blessings of God related to the offense lead you to forgiveness.

 Let humility lead you to forgive

Reflect on your own sinfulness (the Examination of Conscience below can help you perform a thorough, substantive examen).  Realize more deeply how you need the forgiveness of God and others.  This can lead you to in turn forgive those who have offended you.

 Let the Saints Inspire You to Forgive

Just three examples of the many saints who have followed the Lord’s teaching regarding forgiveness.

The Acts of the Apostles portrays St. Stephen imitating Christ (Lk 23:34, see above) in praying for forgiveness for those who were unjustly killing him, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” Acts 7:60

St. Paul Miki and 25 companions were martyred in Japan in the 16th century.  According to an account of the martyrdom by a contemporary writer they endured torment and derision and then were taken to Nagasaki where they were crucified.  As Paul Miki was dying on the cross he said,  “My religion tells me to pardon my enemies and all who have offended me.  I do gladly pardon the Emperor and all who have sought my death.” (The Liturgy of the Hours, Catholic Book Publishing Co., New York, 1975, Vol. III Feb. 6 p. 1368)

St. Maria Faustina was persecuted and harassed by some of the other sisters in her convent.  This hurt and perplexed her as a convent is supposed to be, above all, a school of charity.  However in place of anger and resentment she saw this as an opportunity sent by Jesus to grow in holiness through forgiveness, extending His mercy to others (highly recommended: Diary of Saint Maria Faustina Kowalska: Divine Mercy in My Soul, Marian Press:Stockbridge MA 01263, 2015 ISBN: 978-1-59614-110-0 Mass Market Edition)

FORGIVENESS PRAYER

The following prayer covers most of the significant areas of forgiveness. Often, such a prayer will bring to mind other areas that need forgiveness. Let the Holy Spirit move freely and guide your mind to individuals or groups that you need to forgive.

Lord Jesus Christ, today I ask to forgive EVERYONE in my life. I know that You will give me the strength to forgive. I am grateful that You love me more than I love myself and want my happiness more than I desire it for myself.

Father, I forgive YOU for the times that death has come into the family, the hard times such as financial difficulties or what I thought were punishments sent by You.  Also when people said, “It’s God’s will” and I became bitter and resentful toward You. Purify my heart and mind today.

Lord, I forgive MYSELF for my sins, faults and failings, for all that is bad in myself or that I think is bad, I forgive myself, and I accept Your forgiveness     

I further forgive MYSELF for taking Your name in vain, not worshipping You by participating in mass on Sunday, for hurting my parents, getting drunk, for sins against purity, bad books, bad movies, fornication, adultery, homosexuality. Also, for abortion, stealing, lying, defrauding, hurting peoples’ reputation. You have forgiven me today, and I forgive myself. Thank you, Lord, for your grace at this moment.

I also forgive MYSELF for any involvement in superstition, the use of Ouija boards, horoscopes, going to seances, using fortune telling or wearing lucky charms, I reject all that superstition and choose You alone as my Lord and Savior. Fill me with Your Holy Spirit.            

I truly forgive my MOTHER. I forgive her for all the times she hurt me, she resented me, she was angry with me and for all the times she punished me. I forgive her for the times she preferred my brothers and sisters to me. I forgive her for the times she told me I was dumb, ugly, stupid, the worst of the children or that I cost the family a lot of money. For the times she told me I was unwanted, an accident, a mistake or not what she expected. I forgive her.                                         

I forgive my FATHER. I forgive him for any non-support, any lack of love, affection or attention. I forgive him for any lack of time, for not giving his companionship, for his drinking, arguing and fighting with my mother or the other children. For his severe punishments, for desertion, for being away from home, for divorcing my mother or for any infidelity, I forgive him. 

Lord, I extend forgiveness to my SISTERS AND BROTHERS. I forgive those who rejected me, lied about me, hated me, resented me, competed for my parents’ love, those who hurt me and physically harmed me. For those who were too severe with me, punished me or made my life unpleasant in any way, I forgive them.

Lord, I forgive my SPOUSE for lack of love, affection, consideration, support, attention and communication; for faults, failings, weaknesses and those acts or words that hurt or disturb me.

Jesus, I forgive my CHILDREN for their lack of respect, obedience, love, attention, support, warmth and understanding.  Also for their bad habits, falling away from the Church and any bad actions of theirs which disturb me.

My God, I forgive my IN-LAWS, MY MOTHER-IN-LAW, FATHER-IN-LAW, SON/DAUGHTER-IN-LAW AND OTHER RELATIVES who treat my family with a lack of love. For all their words, thoughts, actions or omissions which injure and cause pain, I forgive them.

Please help me to forgive my RELATIVES, my grandmother and grandfather, aunts, uncles, cousins who may have interfered in our family, been possessive of my parents, who may have caused confusion or turned one parent against the other.

Jesus, help me to forgive my CO-WORKERS who are disagreeable or make life miserable for me. For those who push their work off on me, gossip about me, won’t cooperate with me or try to take my job. I forgive them.

 MY NEIGHBORS need to be forgiven, Lord. For all their noise, letting their property run down, not tying up their dogs who run through my yard, not taking in their trash barrels, being prejudiced and running down the neighborhood.  I forgive them.

I now forgive my CLERGYMAN, my CONGREGATION and my CHURCH for their lack of support, affirmation, bad sermons/homilies, pettiness, lack of friendliness, not providing me or my family with the inspiration we need, for any hurts they have inflicted on me or my family, even in the distant past.  For coming to conclusions and making judgments about me without consulting me, only listening to my detractors; not knowing when they’re under the influence of the evil one and damaging the church as a result.  I forgive them today.

Lord, I forgive all those who are of different PERSUASIONS, those holding opposite political views and have attacked me, ridiculed me, discriminated against me, made fun of me or economically hurt me.

I forgive those of different religious DENOMINATIONS AND BELIEFS who have harassed me, attacked me, argued with me or forced their view on me or my family.

Those who have harmed me ETHNICALLY, have discriminated against me, mocked me, made jokes about my race or nationality, hurt my family physically, emotionally or economically. I forgive them today.

Lord, I forgive all PROFESSIONAL PEOPLE who have hurt me in any way: doctors, nurses, lawyers, judges, politicians and civil servants. I forgive all service people: policemen, firemen, bus drivers, hospital workers and especially repairmen who have taken advantage of me in their work.

Lord, I forgive my EMPLOYER for not paying me enough, for not appreciating my work, for being unkind and unreasonable with me, for being angry or unfriendly, for not promoting me and for not complimenting me on my work.

Lord, I forgive my SCHOOL TEACHERS AND INSTRUCTORS of the past as well as the present. For those who punished me, humiliated me, insulted me, treated me unjustly, made fun of me, called me dumb or stupid or made me stay after school, I truly forgive them today.

Lord, I forgive my FRIENDS who have let me down, lost contact with me, do not support me, were not available when I needed help, borrowed money and did not return it or gossiped about me.

Lord Jesus, I especially pray for the grace of forgiveness for the ONE PERSON WHO HAS HURT ME THE MOST. I ask to forgive anyone whom I consider my greatest enemy, the one who is the hardest to forgive or the one who I said I will never forgive.

Lord, I beg pardon of all those people I have hurt, especially my mother and father and my spouse. I am especially sorry for the three greatest hurts I have inflicted on each.

Thank you Jesus, for being freed of the evil of unforgiveness. Let Your Holy Spirit fill me with light and let every dark area of my mind be enlightened. Amen.

Forgiveness is an act of the will, not a feeling. If we pray for a person, we can be assured that we have forgiven that person.

To help accept an individual and open ourselves to a particular person more, picture him/her with the Lord Jesus and say to the Lord, “I love him/her because You love him/her. I forgive him/her because You forgive him/her.” Forgiveness is a life-long obligation. Every day we need to forgive those who hurt or injure us.

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EXAMINATION OF CONSCIENCE FOR CONFESSION

 The examination of conscience (thinking honestly about your life and recognizing your sinfulness) is the first step in celebrating the Sacrament of Reconciliation (going to confession).  The following list will help you make a good examination of conscience.  It is not a complete list of sins but provide good examples of the types of things we should consider when preparing to ask for God’s mercy and forgiveness.

Is God first in my life or do I put myself or the things of the world such as money, material things, success, fame, pleasure, power, honor or prestige before God?  Do I own my possessions or do they own me?

Do I make time to read the Bible pray the rosary every day?  Do I go to mass on Sunday or do I make excuses and not go?  Do I go to confession every month as Mary, the Mother of God has advised us to do? (see other side of this sheet, “How often should I go to confession?”)

Do I provide a witness of faith to everyone I meet, especially those who are fallen away or alienated from the Catholic Church, those who have no faith and people of non-Christian religions?

Do I share my time, financial blessings and talent with the community, especially the Church and the less fortunate?  Do I set aside a reasonable amount of time every week or month to volunteer?

Do I treat all people with the respect they deserve as children of God, especially those of other races, ethnic groups, languages and religions?  Do I have racist attitudes?  Am I prejudiced against certain people or cultures?

Do I forgive from the heart as the gospel says or do I remain bitter, resentful and harbor grudges?

“Why do you notice the splinter in your neighbor’s eye but do not perceive the wooden beam in your own?” Lk 6:41-42  Do I judge others while ignoring my own sins, faults, mistakes and weaknesses?  

Would Christ approve of my relationships with my family and friends?  Am I the kind of spouse and parent I should be or do I put myself first?  Am I the kind of son/daughter that Jesus wants me to be or am I selfish and fall to the temptation to disobey and disrespect my parents and teachers?  Do I fight and argue instead of trying to resolve my differences with others peacefully by communication (talking things out with an attitude of love, respect and an openness to their point of view)?

Am I doing my best to promote gospel values such as respect for life, peace and justice?

Do I have a controlling personality?  Does everything always have to be done my way?

If I am single do I violate God’s moral law by engaging in sexual activity in my thoughts, with myself or others, be they of the opposite or same sex?  Do I support the pornography industry by using and especially buying porn?  Have I used artificial birth control instead of Natural Family Planning?  Do I dress modestly? (www.Fatima.org > search: Christian Modesty.  Adultery: If I am married have I had sexual activity with someone other than my spouse?  If I am single have I had sexual activity with someone else’s spouse?

Am I prophetic and speak up when I should or do I stay quiet and not say anything?

Have I damaged someone’s reputation by malicious speech or gossip?  Have I used God’s name in vain?

Am I a person of integrity who always speaks the truth or do I lie or speak half truths?

Do I abuse myself through the sinful use of alcohol, drugs, lack of exercise or insufficient rest and recreation?  Do I observe the sabbath – a day of rest and worship – every week?

Am I honest about my debts and prioritize them in my budget so I can pay them in a timely manner?

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THE TWO MAIN TYPES OF SIN

The examination of conscience should include both of the following types of sin.

2. Sin of commission. “… what I have done.”  A sin of commission is an action, like having an abortion, consenting to sex with someone without being married to them in the Church, stealing, lying, being racist, cheating etc.  Other examples of sins of commission: 10 Commandments, see Ex 20, 1-17.
3. Sin of omission. “… what I have failed to do.”  The sin of omission is when we fail to do something we know we should do.  Sins of omission are just as much a source of suffering and evil in the world as sins of commission.  Examples of sins of omission: not going to mass on Sunday without a good reason; failing to evangelize (share our faith); not helping someone who needs our assistance; failing to do our part in the struggle for the right to life, peace and justice. Other sins of omission: the Beatitudes, see Mt 5, 3-10.

 THE SACRAMENT OF RECONCILIATION

 Your conscience is the  moral voice within you telling you what you should and should not do. The Church teaches this is a way God speaks to us. Sin is knowingly deciding and acting against your conscience. Conversion is replacing our sinful ways of thinking and acting with a life of holiness. It is the way to salvation (going to heaven).  Catholics are privileged to receive sanctifying grace in the Sacrament of Penance by which they are forgiven for their sins.

How often should I go to confession?  Mary the Mother of God says to us, her beloved children, “What person does not need the grace of confession every month?”  Her words remind us that we human beings are inclined to sin.  We are spiritually weak and fall to the enticements of the devil (temptation).  The resulting sin endangers our salvation and offends God who loves us beyond our comprehension.  Therefore confession should be a regular part of the spiritual life of a Catholic.  It is not just for the big events of life like First Communion, Confirmation, weddings etc.  Consider the following spiritual fruits of confession.

What are the spiritual effects of the Sacrament of Reconciliation?

• Reconciliation with God by which the penitent regains grace
• Reconciliation with the Church
• The remission, at least in part, of the temporal punishment due to sin
• The remission of eternal punishment due to mortal sins
• The peace and serenity that come from knowing your sins are forgiven
• An increase in spiritual strength to live a good Catholic life

Do I have to go to confession before going to communion?  NO!  We do not have to be perfect to go to communion.  No one is perfect, including the priest consecrating the bread and wine at mass. Even the greatest saints sinned.  The sanctifying grace of the Eucharist is essential for our becoming another Christ in the world.  For this reason, we can – and should – go to communion at mass (unless we are in a state of mortal sin, such as murder, abortion, or consciously rejecting God from our life.  In the case of mortal sin we should always go to confession before going to communion).  Receiving the sanctifying grace of the Body and Blood of Christ in Communion is the principal reason for going to mass (the other main reasons are listening to the Word of God and joining your Catholic community of faith in thanking and praising God for the gift of salvation).

 Act of Contrition  Oh my God, I am sincerely sorry for having offended you. I detest all my sins because of your just punishments.  But most of all, because they offend you, my God, who are all good and deserving of all my love and the love of everyone.  I firmly resolve, with the help of your grace, to sin no more and to live according to your will.  Amen.⛪️

^[1] Rev. William E. Zimmer C.P.A., M.B.A., S.T.L., D. Min. email: padrebill77@yahoo.com   mobile phone: 224.616.8305  Original and all subsequent versions Copyright by Rev. William E. Zimmer 2016.  All rights reserved.  Anyone who receives this handout from Fr. Zimmer in any form may distribute it to anyone they wish for the purpose of helping them to forgive.  In fact he encourages you to do so!  However if you use any of this material in a published book, article etc. please make the appropriate reference: “Forgive Us Our Trespasses As We Forgive Those Who Trespass Against Us” (Mt 6:12; Lk 11:4) Paths To Forgiveness by Rev. William E. Zimmer June 26, 2026.